Salutations, traveler of The Internets! Welcome to William's Bloody Hell, so named after our founder, Sir Bloody William.
He is seen in the likeness above in a rare, 19th century woodcut. This
image was rumoured to have been
commissioned after a bout of unpleasantness
in the White Chapel district of London. Do enjoy your stay and peruse our many, varied offerings, much of which cannot be found elsewhere!
:: Today's soundtrack: The Smiths "Work is a Four-Letter Word" ::
I have recently noticed a certain, shall we say, inappropriateness with regards to certain television commercials. No, I don't mean like the last time I mentioned a particular ad which irked me (see Pictures of You). This goes a little beyond the choice in song used in the commercial. Let's begin.
For starters, have you ever noticed how commercials for female-type products can just sneak up on you? And I'm not just talking about feminine hygiene items here, although they are the largest offenders. There is a new line of ads for a certain pregnancy test out which starts out talking about something completely unrelated to women, babies, and pregnancy. Then mentions whatever said topic is and its low accuracy percentage, and then says that their pregnancy test is 99.9% accurate. OK, I guess that's one way you'd talk about a build-it-yourself book shelf and a pregnancy kit in one breath. Also, I find it interesting that alot of these feminine product commercials use music which can also be found on the soundtrack to a soft-core porn film on Cinemax. Don't believe me? Next time you see a commercial for that birth control patch let me know I'm wrong.
Another commercial series which has ticked me off to know end, are the UPS ads which have clients referring to UPS as "Brown." Sure the trucks are brown and the courier uniforms are brown, but that don't make it the company name darn it. Are we copyrighting colors now? Can I start calling Staples, "Red"? Best Buy "Blue and Yellow"? OK this may seem like small potatoes, but if you've seen the one where that middle aged guy refers to utilizing UPS's services as "plugging into the big brown machine," there just seems to be something inherently wrong with that statement. But then, maybe my mind is in the gutter.
Last thing. I have come to dislike the ads for prescription medications where they don't even tell you what the medicine is used to treat! All they do is say "ask your doctor if a free sample of____ is right for you!" and go on to list possible side effects. Alrighty, I'll go up to my doctor and say, "hey, doc, is prescription Levitra right for me?" and then he'll say "why do you have erectile dysfunction?" No thank you.
William (now available in 3
flavors!)
