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Rants >> Rant 160

:: Today's soundtrack: Simple Minds "Don't You Forget About Me" ::


I like to watch movies. This should not come as a complete surprise to you if you've poked around the whole of this site even a little. I have a home video collection which is rivaling my music collection in size. I enjoy viewing films both at home and in the theater. Unfortunately for me, my area has only a small selection of theaters to choose from (the closest currently being about an hour's drive away), and none of them have "cheap seats," so unless I can manage to drag my lazy ass out of bed before noon (yeah right) for a matinee, the price of a ticket at an evening show at the cinema can run rather high, especially if you factor in the gasoline for that hour drive. So, these days I mainly go to the theater for a movie if it is something I'm really excited about and just can't wait to see it as soon as possible.

I do so enjoy going out to the cinema, but I have an odd quirk that goes along with my movie viewing: I like to watch the end credits. I really do. I like to hear what music they're going to play (be it an actual song or more of the score). I like to read who played the parts of certain roles particularly if there was an actor I recognized but couldn't quite put my finger on. I like reading the soundtrack information. I just plain like them, all the way through. Unfortunately for me, most of the rest of the world couldn't give a rat's ass about the closing credits, which kind of puts me in a bit of a spot.

For one thing, if I ever go to the theater with a group of friends, most of them will have their coats on and are ready to file out of there as soon as the screen fades to black. There I'll be, still seated, listening to the lovely music, and reading what I can as the names scroll on by, when my friends are shouting the movie's over (like I hadn't noticed) and it's time to go. Reluctantly I too put on my coat and leave, not wanting to be the one to hold every one up against their will. Oh well.

Unfortunately, it's not only other film-watching patrons who feel this way, sometimes it can be theater staff as well, and this REALLY ticks me off. Just today I went to see World Trade Center, everyone else had left, but I hadn't noticed as I was busy looking over the credits when an usher came in and told me I had to leave because they had to start the next showing in two minutes and there was a crowd. Well, excuse me, I had paid to watch this film, and I wanted to see it the entire way through, but no. Also, there is another theater I used to frequent which would turn up the house lights and just outright stop running the film after the majority of the people left the room. This is not only terribly inconsiderate of the customer, but also just plain wrong! For instance, I had gone to see Hellboy at this theater and they once again cut off the credits. I was discussing the film with my friends afterwards, and I mentioned that the movie had left a plot hole concerning one character who asked to be left behind, and he was still back there when the movie ended. Well, I found out later from my brother who had seen it at a different movie house that at the end of the credits they go back to that guy. I was pissed off to have missed that bit!

Movies are doing this more and more, adding "stingers" in the middle of and at the end of their credits, so it really bothers me when I'm not allowed to see them the whole way through. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy had a cute Guide entry midway through, many films now show bloopers and outtakes during the credits and some movies like X-men 3  have pivotal plot points stealthily added, so why am I still in the minority? Why are theaters still so eager to toss me on my ear before they even get through the cast listing? About one-third of the people I talked to who saw X-men 3 the opening week had no idea about the stinger at the end (word hadn't gotten around yet), left the theater and were disappointed when they heard what they'd missed. There is an easy remedy: everyone, watch the damn credits with me!

William (my only friend, the end)

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