Salutations, traveler of The Internets! Welcome to William's Bloody Hell, so named after our founder, Sir Bloody William.
He is seen in the likeness above in a rare, 19th century woodcut. This
image was rumoured to have been
commissioned after a bout of unpleasantness
in the White Chapel district of London. Do enjoy your stay and peruse our many, varied offerings, much of which cannot be found elsewhere!
::Today's soundtrack: The Cars "Drive" ::
Every once in a while I wonder if once somebody gets behind the wheel of their car they suddenly become unable to follow simple directions.
There are a couple of parking lots in my town, see, and they have and "entrance" and an "exit." These are separate and clearly marked with signs. And yet, many people still insist upon going out the entrance or visa versa and guess what, I almost end up in a car accident because some nimrod could not read a sign! Yes, I know going out this entrance will allow you bypass that traffic light at the intersection, but it will also allow you to come face first into my front bumper!! I shouldn't come within inches of an accident when I followed the instructions on the sign and you didn't! Here's a tip: learn to fucking READ!
At my bank there are two handicapped parking spots. I was both shocked and appalled when the other day I saw a young, blonde girl park in not one, but BOTH handicapped spots and then go running into the bank. You're in a hurry, I get that. I also get that the regular parking spaces on either side of the handicapped ones were vacant. You could have parked mere feet from where you were. Also, let me "congratulate" you on straddling BOTH of those handicapped spaces like that. It isn't every day that you see someone as inconsiderate as you, you horrid bitch. You couldn't have just taken up one undeserved handicapped spot, oh nooooooo! I mean, I glanced at her plate, and it wasn't designated as handicapped, and judging by the way she ran as though all of Hell were at her heels, I'm guessing her physical health is just peachy. And this, it doesn't even INVOLVE actual reading like with entrances vs. exits!! The parking space is painted BLUE with a wheelchair guy stick figure in it! Maybe she was retarded.
You know what REALLY burns my toast, though? It's when people see and hear an emergency vehicle with lights-a-flashing and siren-a-wailing and yet they do not get out of the way! What, do you think that siren is an ice cream truck?! That police car is blaring at you because it NEEDS to be somewhere NOW because bad shit is going down not because it feels like being annoying! An emergency vehicle, be it police car, fire engine or ambulance, will light its flashy-lights and crank the siren because it needs you to get the merry hell out of its way thank you very much so pull the fuck over, dammit! Be considerate for once in your god damned life and let the ambulance by so it can, I don't know, save somebody's life!! Oh, I'm sorry you're right, that pizza you're picking up is waaaaaaaaaaaaaay more important! By all means, don't give up the right of way for a fire truck; it'll wait patiently for you to get to the pizza place and somebody goes homeless because their house burned to ground since no one was there to put it out. Oh well. That pizza was good and you had a coupon. Bastard.
Don't even get me started on the lack of proper use of turn signals. Must... keep.... head.... from exploding....
William the Bloody (wheeljacked)
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