Salutations, traveler of The Internets! Welcome to William's Bloody Hell, so named after our founder, Sir Bloody William.
He is seen in the likeness above in a rare, 19th century woodcut. This
image was rumoured to have been
commissioned after a bout of unpleasantness
in the White Chapel district of London. Do enjoy your stay and peruse our many, varied offerings, much of which cannot be found elsewhere!
It's starting to bother me again, bad grammar.
These days, I'm beginning to notice more the evil double negatives. There's a woman I know because of work and she says ALL the time "I don't know neither" or similar. Good gravy, I wonder if she's cognizant as to how stupid she sounds. Yeah, I'm all for the intentional use of double negatives to purposefully sound ignorant or funny (re: "I ain't done nothin', officer!"), but people who normally speak that way drive up a wall!
Another thing we have quite a bit of where I live is people who say "I seen." Example: "Yeah, I seen that guy yesterday at the store." Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!! Just shoot me in the head right now, please. You can not say "seen" on its own! You have to have the word "have" or "has" preceding it! It's scary that this has been going on around me for generations because I remember growing up with it and it's surrounding me still. The "cool" kids in junior high spoke like this and probably still do. I can only hope that their children won't inherit this horrendous habit of grammatical murder.
Something that happens all over the place is non-utilization of the word "whom." So many people say "who's kissing who" when that should really be "who's kissing WHOM"! WHOM, WHOM, WHOM! Sadly, it seems like very few people actually use the word "whom" EVER. I have a sinking feeling that it will cease to exist all together in about 50 years and the bad grammar will have taken over and mutated into being proper. I can only hope I'm dead by that time.
People of the world, know how to use your pronouns! In a comparison statement, it's NOT "I'm prettier than her" it's really "I'm prettier than SHE." Honestly, it is. Also when answering the telephone "May I speak to Stephen, please?" the correct response is: "This is HE." YOU GOT THAT? Now you have no excuse.
Once again, I don't claim my grammar to be by any means perfect (my punctuation in this one rant alone is probably seizure inducing), but at least I do try. Seriously, double negatives and such are taught in elementary school as incorrect! So unless you're a fourth grade drop-out, I would assume that the majority of people have the ability to retain information they learned as a child. As a child, I say! If nine year olds know it's not right, shouldn't you? You're only making yourself look dumb and sound terribly uneducated and is that what you want someone's first impression of you to be? And now, let's start the international rejuvenating the use of whom campaign before it's too late! Don't let language be trod on and destroyed by those who don't know how to use it properly! Let's not allow the linguistic idiots dictate the future of grammar! Let's just all remember that just because that's how most people say it, doesn't make it the right way to say it! Popularity doesn't make it proper!!
Gah! Okay, I'm done.
William (fire bad, grammar good)
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