Salutations, traveler of The Internets! Welcome to William's Bloody Hell, so named after our founder, Sir Bloody William.
He is seen in the likeness above in a rare, 19th century woodcut. This
image was rumoured to have been
commissioned after a bout of unpleasantness
in the White Chapel district of London. Do enjoy your stay and peruse our many, varied offerings, much of which cannot be found elsewhere!
:: Today's soundtrack: The Smiths "William, It Was Really Nothing" ::
There's something you all should know. I have one weird sense of humor. I have a tendency to find things funny that no right minded or compassionate human being would find funny. For example:
The original Texas Chainsaw Massacre film is hilarious to me. When they pick up the crazy hitch hiker and he keeps describing the cow slaughter process oh man is that great. Also, when that sort of retarded wheelchair guy gets the chainsaw square in the face that's some funny stuff. And of course I would be remiss not to mention the dinner scene. Wow. Is that ever hysterical.
Still don't think I'm that weird yet? How about this: the trailers for The Passion of the Christ crack me up. Ok, I haven't seen the actual movie yet, so I'm not saying that that cracks me up. There was just this one particular scene they'd show in the commercials of these two burly guys raising their whips that I found funny. I think it was the expressions on their faces and the fact that the camera was going in slooooow motion. The image of these men grimacing in slow motion just sent me over the edge. I'm sure once I see the scene in its proper context it will be LESS funny, but I didn't want to see this movie in the theater just in case. I mean, to be the guy in the theatre laughing at a whipping?
No? Not that callous and unfeeling sense of humor you were hoping for? Well then: "Feline Leukemia." OK, OK. I don't find the actual disease to be funny. No no no. But, there's just something about the phrase "feline leukemia" that makes me laugh. I suppose it's akin to those people who find the word "Uranus" funny. The planet itself isn't that funny, but the word Uranus is. So don't alienate me because you think I hate cats or anything. That's not the case. I love cats. Adore them. I think they're the most shamelessly cute species on the planet. But if someone says feline leukemia to me, I can't stop laughing. It doesn't even have to be in any context. You could just walk right up to me and just say those two words and I'll laugh.
What did I tell you? And this is just scratching the surface, my friends. I also have a tendency to find certain deaths and tragedies quite funny when I read about them in the paper or see them on the news. Like oh, a local Girl Scout troop was robbed of $6,000. Man was that funny.
