Salutations, traveler of The Internets! Welcome to William's Bloody Hell, so named after our founder, Sir Bloody William.
He is seen in the likeness above in a rare, 19th century woodcut. This
image was rumoured to have been
commissioned after a bout of unpleasantness
in the White Chapel district of London. Do enjoy your stay and peruse our many, varied offerings, much of which cannot be found elsewhere!
::Today's soundtrack: MDFMK "Torpedoes" ::
Some of you may recall that at the beginning of the year I was "forced" to change my e-mail due to my old carrier selling out to a new one. Fairpoint bought all of Verizon's accounts in New England, mine included. All things considered, it was a relatively painless transition, and I am only recently realizing a "side effect" to the switch. The spambots have yet to track me down. Seriously, in these past, what, six months, I have had literally ONE spam e-mail. It's kind of off-putting, actually. And a small amount of troubling since, as you may know, I had often relied upon the silliness of my spam e-mails to generate rant content when nothing else was available. Well, rant ideas have been difficult to come by lately and I've had no e-mail spam fodder. But wait! I have access to another kind of spam! A very few of you people on the internets are probably aware of the fact that I have administrative powers at an online forum. This means I activate new accounts and delete account that are spambots in sheep's clothing. Well not actual sheep's clothing. Metaphorical sheep's clothing since sheep don't wear clothes and all. Well, I suppose they COULD if they were to have a really weird owner who liked to dress them up and have tea parties or something. ... Okaaaay, let's all take a moment to get that disturbing image out of our heads. All set? Good. My point being that I look over the members applying for membership to this forum and decide based on the entered information whether or not I am dealing with a real person (in which case membership is granted) or an insidious spambot (then the account is deleted WITH prejudice).
More often than not, spambots will use randomly aggregated usernames like this:
Clearly, this is utter nonsense and is promptly deleted. Then, other times they are obviously real words, but nonetheless clearly a spambot, such as:
Yeah, somehow I don't think a real member would want to have a name like that. And then there is all that stuff in between:
Hmm. What formula are we talking about here? Ooooh if it's Green Goblin Formula... count me in! I'll take some of that!
Um.... LESBIAN SEX: UR DOIN IT RONG.
It's funny, but all my eyes want to read when I glance at this is "my penis." I wonder what this says about me?
Now, I'm not sure where on my body the "imfhetka" is, so I'm pretty sure I DON'T want to have sex in there.
Wow! Now THAT sounds like a business! Who doesn't want to get back at a slut every once in a while? A guy who caught his girl cheating on him? A girl who found out her guy is cheating on him with some ho-bag? I have to start a business model for that!
Better watch out, Cojerve, but if you're as "whorie" as you claim, some one just MAY be "getting back" at you for something soon!
Okay, now THAT is simply HILARIOUS. Of all the random words in the world and all of the endless combinations... THIS. WOW. Who else came up with a sweet visual to that? Something involving a purple suit and a great big ol' pheasant feather, perhaps?
Cool spy names... Spy Emope? FAIL.
"My name is... Sexual. Max Sexual." He's sexual... to the MAX! Now THAT'S a cool spy name.
I'm not even sure what... How does "jasmin" make these chats hotter? I don't...?
NOW you are talkin' MY language! Sign me up for that immediately! Oh wait... can I BE one of the sexy pirates people call to chat with? I think I hear my dream job calling...
...aaaaand that's that for now. I'll be sure to keep an eye on those pesky 'bots for y'all and I'll let you know if anything else... er... "interesting" shows up. And fear not! None shall escape my eagle eye and gain actual membership to the forum. Unless of course I think it would be really, REALLY funny. Then, who knows.
William the Bloody (spam police)
